appalling_cynicism
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27th-Apr-2009 07:18 pm - Daisy needs a hug
appalling_cynicism: (The solution to life's problems)
I just feel tired and broken at the moment. I need something good to happen.

In order to make something good happen, well, I'm not sure what I'm going to do, but I'll do something. Maybe talk A into going out for cocktails. Get all dressed up and go out, listen to music, and maybe chat to some randoms. Just, something.

Music has been a big help lately. The songs on highest rotation have been:
Stitching Leggings by Kate Nash
Breathe by Anna Nalick
Samson by Regina Spektor
Get Better by Mates of State
Today Has Been Okay by Emiliana Torrini
Wrong Again by Kirsty MacColl
Special Ones by George
Keep Breathing by Ingrid Michaelson
Infinity by Inara George feat. Bryony Attkinson
Thanks for Today by Kate Miller-Heidke
You may note that they mostly involve a girl and her piano. Also, mostly kind of melancholy and pretty.
31st-Dec-2008 01:52 am - Less crazy tonight
appalling_cynicism: (Hit you with a perfect spiral of truth)
Okay, so I am definitely saner tonight, there is much less freaking out. I am still lonely and the rest, but tolerably so. I talked to a couple of friends who inadvertently reminded me of how much they love me. Also, how much I love them. I have amazing friends who I can talk to for 45 minutes without discussing anything of importance. So yeah, back to relatively well-adjusted.

I am spending New Year eating brownies and watching Heroes. I may love this plan a bit. I don't care how tragic it may be.

[livejournal.com profile] flaaa_blah, according to my flatmate, your package has arrived. I haven't opened it yet (the whole not in Brissie thing), but thank you in advance! It is weirdly exciting to be going home to shiny, shiny mail.

Erm, [livejournal.com profile] broncobabe007 may have talked me into shipping John O./Stephen Colbert. This is bad, I think. This is also requiring Colbert!picspam. Just remember, intelligence and humour are fricking hot.

Seriously, I would marry him despite him actually being twice my age )

The picture with mini!Stephen freaks me out. It really truly does. Also, I imagine this is the last picspam of 2008. I'd say it is ending on a high.
30th-Dec-2008 12:32 am - Look at me whine.
appalling_cynicism: (A house of cards)
All things considered, I am reasonable well adjusted. I mean, with the obvious exception of my inability to function without regular bouts of physical contact with other people. I need the physical affection of another, be it a resting a hand on my shoulder, leaning on someone while we watch a movie, or full blown hugs. I just don't function without physical reassurance of affection. Anyway, my point is that I am basically permanently single (I'm twenty-one years old and have never been on a date) and I am mostly okay with that. I am loved and I love those around me, that is usually enough. Tonight, however, I am just lonely. Ridiculously lonely. I just want someone to want me, which is stupid and vain, but I don't care. I know that it won't happen if I just keep doing what I'm doing, but I am terrified of trying and failing. So I just keep hanging out with friends in my comfort zone, and keeping to myself at uni, and generally avoiding leaving my flat if I don't have to, none of which is in the least bit helpful.
16th-Jun-2008 02:48 am - More on the 'Strangely Pathetic' front
appalling_cynicism: (I'd kiss you if it wouldn't kill me)
It is quite disturbing how rapidly I go from relatively happy and well-adjusted to a giant mopey lump when deprived of physical affection. Yet I insist on living with one of the least physically affectionate people I know. Actually, she is probably the least physically affectionate person I know as I tend to gravitate to people more like me.

Touch starved and assignment stressed makes Daisy miss her Mum.
1st-Jun-2008 01:25 am - I miss hugs
appalling_cynicism: (My brain hurts)
I adore my flatmate more than I can express with words, but she is useless at physical affection. Poor girl looks absolutely terrified when she thinks I need a hug, practically pushes me out the door to go find another, more cuddly, friend. She tries though, and I appreciate that.

I will never understand the uni students who are only in it for themselves. Being a student is hard enough without everyone hoarding their knowledge, unwilling to help or share. Honestly, the only students worse than the suck ups that ask questions during the lectures, are the ones who just look at you when you say you need help. I'm sure you all know the look I mean, the if you can't do it by now, you should just drop out look. Surely it is not that hard to try to help. I know it is not that hard to try to help, because that is what I do when someone asks me.

There is a rant about the debacle that was the Bill Henson exhibition building. For now though, so many people have said so many things that have pissed me off so much that I just have no coherent thoughts about it any more. I am looking at you, Sydney Morning Herald opinion pieces.
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